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Imagine I’m walking the red carpet in a gown so long and heavy that 15 large men are needed to haul it behind me as I walk. As dozens of roses are being thrown at my feet a tiny hole in the carpet opens up and I slip on a rose and am so quickly sucked into the hole and I just fall and slip away, it is a black hole and as soon as I fall through it disappears. I am sent spinning through space galaxies away and am never seen nor heard from again aside from the tweets that I send out from my phone that reach earth a few years later.

I am Earth’s greatest mystery


--Petra

I imagine you on a glorious stage with an immense and extravagant gown made of gold with a train that extends 30 feet behind you and as the orchestra slowly quiet their instruments a spotlight shines upon you and with one hand clasping your heart you reach out the other towards the audience as you say “…ENIGMA!!” as flocks of doves from either side of the stage are let loose and the orchestra plays up again and wild tigers are released onto the stage and babies cry and women scream and you’re just LOOKING out directly at me with the most severe makeup and a cat eye painted so sharply that when I look upon your face I am instantly cut in half


--Petra

  • Elisper Whisper:
    pls when can you come here when can you come to me my loverly buttplug

choice selections of petra’s reactions to GoT in no specific order 

I LET OUT A SINGLE, PIERCING HONK  OF LAUGHTER IN MY QUIET HOME WHEN I READ THIS

I LET OUT A SINGLE, PIERCING HONK  OF LAUGHTER IN MY QUIET HOME WHEN I READ THIS


Oranges are the Devil's Fruit:
Full of the hilarity from your three leading ladies (and friends).

Starring


Elise toothsomephantom
Elisper Whisper or Drixenol

Katie kt-boundary
Richard Simmons, Richard Gay Ass Simmons, Katiebutt, & Doge Is Pleased

Petra dameofphantasma
Frida Kahlo, Mama Petra, & Petrinka Fluffleweather